November 2025 – Girl Who Would be KING on Life, Style and INSPIRATION.

Musings: Cult is King

It’s a cult world after all. Have you seen the signs? I mean,someone just asked me if I did all my Christmas shopping. Shopping is no longer my Religion.Advertising is targeting the most vulnerable by creating urgency, excitement, and a sense of scarcity and making us feel like we’ll miss out if we don’t buy now.

Unfollowing social cues is hard for a lot of people because it has been so ingrained in us that the day after Thanksgiving, you go to the stores and you go shopping. Same with Boxing day – day after Christmas in Canada and other commonwealth countries.

Ads emphasize limited-time offers, doorbusters, and while supplies last messaging. This psychological trigger makes people act quickly, fearing they’ll lose the deal.

Brands start promoting weeks in advance with “sneak peeks” and countdowns. This builds anticipation and conditions shoppers to plan purchases around the event. I mean, you can almost go broke with all the money you end up saving!

I’ve been a victim of this too. I’ve recently ordered a few things online during way-too-early Black Friday sales (isn’t Black Friday supposed to follow Thursday Thanksgiving??). Anyway, I’m very careful not to get carried away. I purchased only a few items that I would’ve purchased anyway. A little discount and saving on shipping in some instances is okay so I was happy to not have gone overboard spending too much. One item is actually practical. But I’m very aware of the pull to spend, spend and I’m pretty much over it ~~okay…I’m getting there~~. I’m tired of the constant bombardment of advertising.

So…funnily enough I came across this interview on the subject. A new book called *Hoodwinked is about how brands mirroring cults stems from our lack of community. People are not finding community and belonging in religion, for instance, or in their workplaces. So they’re turning to brands.

Amy Odell interviews Dr. Mara Einstein on how marketers use the same tactics as cults. (YouTube video at bottom).

Brands came in to fill this void [because] we don’t have the cultural and social institutions that we used to have that became means for us to form our identity. Religion used to be something that people connected to and that was very much a part of who they were. Every Sunday you went to church or Saturday you went to temple or you went to mosque. Or your job – people worked for IBM for 30 years.

Most people don’t have that anymore. And so brands came in to fill the void. They [started] purpose marketing, right? Brands began to connect themselves to causes. Some companies do it better than others. Patagonia is very much connected to sustainability. Rihanna’s brand Fenty is very much connected to this idea of being all-inclusive. When people go to the store they think, Do I want to connect myself with Fenty and Rihanna and this idea of being part of a group of people, or do I want to buy a product by a brand like Maybelline that doesn’t mean anything? (FYI – I like Fenty eyebrow pencil and lipstick – bought without realizing the brand belonged to Rihanna…just saying).

How exactly are brands like cults?

Cults lure people in with deception. So what cults do is invite you to have a free dinner, have a free meditation class. You start to connect with the people and you come for another dinner and another yoga class, then they upsell you to take another class, and eventually you become part of the group.

Before digital spaces, cults had to be in far off places, like Guyana for Jonestown. But because of digital, we are separated from people who disagree with us, and so we have cult-like spaces now online. This replicates what we talk about as the marketing funnel – at the top of the marketing funnel, you introduce your product to people, you make them aware of it. Then the next part of the funnel is to convert. It’s really funny that we use the word convert when you buy because of the connection to religion.

Hermès has this whole racket with Birkin bags, which you see talked about online endlessly. People make videos of trying to go and buy bags and getting rejected. Hermès sells bags to people who spend a certain amount on other stuff. Sometimes when they offer you a bag, it might not be the bag that you want – it might be a big red bag. They’re like, “Well, this is the bag I have for you today.” You can take it or leave it, and maybe they’ll call you again or maybe they won’t. Hermes is like a cult, right?

Sidenote from GWWBK – The Bag that Got Away: years ago in Toronto I placed an order for a Birkin bag at Holt Renfrew. It was a medium size black leather. I forgot all about it until over a year later the store called to tell me my bag had arrived. They said they can only hold it for 24 hours before they call next in line to purchase. I started to get anxiety around it as the bag at that time was around 6K (what a deal! – compared to now it was). I ended up going into the store, held the bag for a few minutes before handing it back to the seller. It wasn’t that I couldn’t afford to buy the bag at that time – it was the pressure that I had to buy it right then and there, and also, I was told how fortunate I was to get the exact bag I originally wanted because people take what they can get. I was turned off by my conclusion that it appeared easier to adopt a baby in a foreign country than to adopt a birkin bag. Also; if I’m being totally honest – I know that Hermès is a quality brand. It emits luxury and status. But I also know that I can buy a beautiful leather handbag and also take a trip to Europe for a lot less. My new bag might not convey the same status but I really, really thought the birkin was not worth that amount of cash. Really! It’s a beautiful bag, but the brainwashing around it was (and still is) disgraceful. I was ashamed that I almost fell prey to the “it bag of the century.” Fast forward to today: you can sell a used Birkin bag for a lot more 6K – they’re still in demand and retain their value. But actually, I was never planning on selling it. Like a house, you only sell if you keep one for yourself!

*The term “hoodwink” dates back to the 16th century. Originally, “hoodwink” literally meant to cover someone’s eyes with a hood or blindfold. Over time, it shifted to a figurative meaning: to blind someone to the truth – hence, to deceive. Yup people – pay attention!

Black Friday: How Fashion Brands Use Cult Tactics on You. Amy Odell interviews Dr. Mara Einstein (on Marketing, Religion and Advertising). Full interview here:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q7oK4VYvXzs

Not totally relevant but I like this quote and was looking for an opportunity to use it somewhere: We are all like penguins on an ice floe, enjoying the view and companionship, until a seal in the water grabs one of us, and the awareness of the danger we all face sets in.

STYLE

Bootie Call

I’m obsessed with boots. I love cowboy boots, knee-high boots, ones that go over-the-knee, biker boots, and a particular style that combines comfort and flexibility with a wide range of outfits.

In a vast universe of boots, there’s a bootie out there that is a must-have in any modern woman’s wardrobe. You probably have a pair and might not even know its name. It’s called the Chelsea and it’s been around for quite some time. I’m a Chelsea girl at heart.

Guess you can say it’s a timeless staple, very versatile as the style is both casual and polished. How many boots can you go from daytime to evening with, that look as good with a pair of jeans as it does with a long skirt or dress pants?

The name applies universally to both men’s and women’s versions. Men’s Chelsea boots often feature slightly chunkier soles or broader silhouettes, but the core design remains the same. They’re popular in both casual and formal menswear – think sleek leather pairs for suits or rugged suede versions for jeans.

The thing is finding the perfect pair. Many of them look the same or very similar. They’re plain enough to not draw too much attention to your foot, but polished enough without all the fuss, and can add just the right amount of edge. They come in all price points too but not all are created equal.

Where did the name come from?

Originally crafted in the Victorian era for Queen Victoria herself, the Chelsea boot was designed to be practical yet elegant. Thanks to its elastic side panels and ankle-high cut, it offered a modern alternative to lace-up boots. Fast forward to the 1960s, and the boot was reborn on the feet of London’s fashion-forward crowd – especially in the Chelsea district, which gave the boot its name. Think Beatles, mod style, and a whole lot of swagger. From royal gardens to rock concerts, they’ve earned a reputation.

I was looking for my perfect pair. No messing around this time. I had a pair that looked great but they wore out over time, and were not all that comfortable. Still, I kept them way past their expiration date.

High heels be gone! These days I prefer a heel that’s not too high but gives some lift, and maybe something small like a buckle that you can see but doesn’t stand out. Makes it a little less plain looking. A slightly rounded toe is best and comfort is key (this is what happens when you get older and come to your senses – although you still want some style).

This is a go-to boot for almost every outfit. It’s a no-brainer. The boots I bought recently are made for walking but I don’t plan to walk over anyone with them. ~~Not yet anyway~~.

How about you? Do you have a favorite style?

THINKAboutit

The Power of Three

Good things always seem to come in three’s. –

So do bad things. I believe it’s more than superstition or an old wives tale…but for now, let’s focus on the positive three’s. Think: “Life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.”

There are other famous three’s – such as Christianity with the Holy Trinity (Father, Son, Holy Spirit).

In Japanese culture, the number three is deeply symbolic and often used to create balance, harmony, and completeness. This preference stems from spiritual, aesthetic, and philosophical traditions. Shinto and Buddhist influence: In Buddhism, the “three jewels” – Buddha, Dharma, and Sangha form the foundation of spiritual practice. In Shinto, the “three sacred treasures” (mirror, sword and jewel) represent virtue. Traditional Japanese gardens, ikebana (flower arranging), and architecture often feature triadic compositions.

In Folklore there are three wishes, three trials, three little pigs. A story has a beginning, middle, and end. In photography and art, dividing a canvas into thirds creates balance and focus. I like that perception for life too. Two dogs and me make three (although I’m allowing for a number four to appear).

Two’s company, but three has more complexity and an ability to create dynamic interactions. Speaking of dynamic interactions…

My personal three words right now are: Courage, Completion and Clarity. It represents the courage to try something new, completion to finish something old and the clarity to let go of what doesn’t serve me. There is a quiet power in doing something you once feared, finishing what you abandoned, and giving yourself what you truly need. This post is about those three choices that can shift your entire course – one brave, one overdue, and one that is clearer than ever.

I read the monthly forecast for a website called “the power path” that a friend of mine turned me on to. The theme for November is “Discovery.”

This is discovery on many levels. Discovery of parts of yourself you never knew or have forgotten about, newfound stamina for change, flexibility you did not think you had, uncomfortable truths about yourself or others, and many things that have been hidden under the surface both personally and in your greater environment and communities. This is all part of the completion cycle of this year as well as an opening into a new landscape that requires a final clearing of past attachments.

Oh, this really resonated with me. Especially since I drove from Vancouver to Palm Springs by myself (with my two dogs of course but they don’t drive). Many people might think this is no big deal, but for me it was. I didn’t do it to prove to anyone that I could. I really tried to find someone to ~~drive~~ accompany me as it was my worst fear to be going it alone. I’m the kind of person who just likes to drive to the grocery store (but I’ll take my scooter instead if the weather is nice). I don’t like traffic, bad weather, lengthy drives, driving at night or being alone on a long drive. So that’s a long list of “no’s.”

Every possibility of having someone accompany me ended up in failure. A friend, who early on said she’d go with me because she has family in Los Angeles, ended up getting cancer (happy to report that she’s doing well). Then a friend of a friend who contemplated going to Palm Springs decided to go to Japan. Then two more people had something crop up unexpectedly (or that’s what they told me). So yeah, I was a bit desperate. And that’s when it dawned on me that if all else fails (which it did) I had no choice but to go it alone.

As it got closer and closer to the time of leaving I dreaded it more and more. I put an app on my phone for directions. I put my phone on a thing that’s supposed to stick to my windshield so that I could clearly see the directions instead of looking down. Said apparatus broke away from the windshield less than two blocks from leaving my place. Fell on the floor by my feet along with the phone, turning the windshield wiper switch on. I couldn’t take the risk of this happening on the highway so for the rest of the trip my phone sat in the passenger seat with me glancing down at it on occasion the whole way.

Luckily I could at least listen to the Humphrey Bogart sounding voice on my app which said things like: “cops up ahead – I wonder if I know these guys from the clubhouse?” “Make a left turn – like you mean it!” “Hazard up ahead – but you and me kid, we eat hazards for breakfast!” In some sense I found his voice calming – until it got repeatedly annoying.

But I made it. I made it in record time too. Surprised myself by remaining remarkably calm, focused & clear headed. I removed the roadblocks in my head that told me “I can’t.” When I got to Palm Springs someone who never made the drive said that it should be relatively easy because all you have to do is follow the road. But no, it’s not that simple. You have to pay constant attention, traffic patterns change and the weather was all over the map.

Wasn’t expecting torrential rain from Seattle to Oregon. Wasn’t expecting fog so heavy so as not to be able to see clearly for a few hours leaving Oregon. Certainly wasn’t expecting to be stopped at the border, taken inside to be finger printed while they went through my car. It was only an hour delay though and the only thing they threw away was Layla’s favourite bag of unopened dog treats which were made in Thailand – while missing my open jar of Panang curry paste, also from Thailand.

On arrival, everything went much smoother than expected. I arranged ahead to hire someone to clean up my outdoor space so I didn’t have to rake dry leaves for days. Everything is operating perfectly. I have a clean, cute, comfortable space. Note to self: you worried for nothing! Let this be a lesson for everything.

The completion aspect is coming together. It’s more about finishing a project I promised myself that I would. I can tell you more about this later. It’s something that I had ruminated about for a long time but never got around to starting until recently. It’s something my late husband said I should do and while I really liked the idea, I just didn’t know how or when to start. Now it’s coming together and I just have to tweak it before putting it out there.

The Clarity is realizing that I’m on the right path. Clarity often comes after courage and completion. When thoughts are aligned and direction is clear. Anxiety ends up fading and calm takes its place. This is what is happening.

“Clarity isn’t just knowing — it’s becoming. It’s the moment your inner compass points true, and you finally feel ready to walk your path.” I said “your” but I really mean “my.” It’s my path. But you can do it too.

The time will come

when, with elation

you will greet yourself arriving

at your own door, in your own mirror

– Derek Walcott (Nobel-Prize winning poet, playwright, and painter) – “Love after Love”