Let’s forget the superstition and make 2013 just a SUPER YEAR!

calendaryearWe arrive every year at what our calendars deem to be the beginning of THE NEW YEAR with the optimists looking forward to it with delight and anticipation and the pessimists who dread it, worrying about the future.  Hey it’s just a calendar! calanderyear4 Why not take it in stride, laugh with it, laugh at it, but, most of all: LAUGH – and laugh out loud so the whole world can hear you!

HONORING NEW YEARS RESOLUTIONS

The reason we rarely follow through on resolutions is because of four annoying facts:

The first fact is that we get too grandiose in our goals, creating too many high hurdles for ourselves to achieve.

The second fact is that we fail to take those resolutions and break them down into much smaller goals that are easier to achieve.

The third fact is we allow those striving goals to drag on far too long, killing our enthusiasm that began the journey in the first place. Choose goals that can be achieved in short spurts of time like a few days or a few weeks. Once you let it drag on too long it is easy to get discouraged and then you end up abandoning your resolution.

And the fourth fact? Waiting all year long to suddenly make a course correction is like taking an old ruin of a 100 year old house and finally deciding to renovate it and so it becomes a dizzying course of action.

2013 ADVICE AND TIPS

Do yourself a favor; make small personal Life corrections all year long and then you can celebrate how much progress you’ve made for the year. Instead of piling a “To Do List” onto yourself at the beginning of a new calendar year, celebrate with a “Finished List” like a birthday celebration of good things. That way you celebrate what is best about yourself instead of worrying about what is not perfect.

Treat yourself kindly, make small personal Life corrections often all year long and then you can breathe a sigh of smug relief when each NEW YEAR begins!                           Excerpts taken from thesocialpoets.blogspot.ca

A few quotes to begin the New Year:

Anonymous
Many people look forward to the New Year for a new start on old habits.

Jay Leno
Now there are more overweight people in America than average-weight people. So overweight people are now average… which means, you have met your New Year’s resolution.

P. J. O’Rourke
The proper behavior all through the holiday season is to be drunk. This drunkenness culminates on New Year’s Eve, when you get so drunk you kiss the person you’re married to.

Bill Vaughan
An optimist stays up until midnight to see the New Year in. A pessimist stays up to make sure the old year leaves.

Oprah Winfrey
Cheers to a New Year and another chance for us to get it right.

 We’ve been given lots of chances so let’s hope we make it right this year!

GOD’s Top 10 New Years Resolutions

Author and humorist, James Napoli, recently interviewed GOD.

“Hi, everyone, it’s me, God. Hey, I’m just like anyone else. I feel the need to take stock of things as we bid farewell to the year just passed and usher in the year ahead. I hope you will find some inspiration in knowing that I have issues, the same as all of you, and that I, too, resolve to make some changes and take up some self-improvement over the next 365 days. Which of these resolutions I break remains to be seen, but if you came up with ten, what do you think your success rate would be? Have a wonderful year, my people!”

Here are GOD’s top 10 New Years Resolutions: 

1. Get on Instagram:  god Can you mere mortals even conceive of the jaw-dropping photographic images I can create whenever I bloody well feel like it? And I’ve got artsy filters you can only dream about. Facebook is going to want a piece of these soul-stirring shots, so move over, shutterbugs. Oh, and if it’s any incentive, I will endeavor to respond personally to every comment you post.                       

2. Start a Viral Dance Craze:goddance It was pretty inspiring when the Gangnam Style dude knocked Justin Bieber off the top of YouTube’s most-viewed videos list. So, I figure if anyone can arrange to get a billion hits, it’s me. Still working out what to call this one, though. Maybe RodnStaff Skank or GodGod Style. Either way, the back up dancers, as you can see, are killer.

3. Update My Privacy Settings:  I need to start taking care of myself and not be available every time you petition me with some half-baked demand. Of course, as bad as it is to be hassled with friend requests, what’s even worse is all these nut jobs posting to my wall.

4. Get Off The Anti-Depressants:  I remember when my shrink first prescribed these things. It felt like the perfect way to even out my thinking after countless years of dealing with the stress of controlling your sad little lives every day. Now who’s got the sad little life? This year, no more selective serotonin reuptake inhibitors for this deity, I can promise you that.

5. Make An Amends:  god1You think you have it tough going back over your history and seeing who you might have pissed off? It’s a good thing eternity means nothing to me, because I’m going to need it.

6. Reconsider Free Will:  I just never know what you whack jobs are going to do with it.

7. Retire ‘OMG’: godomgThe fact is, you lazy, slothful humans, with just four more letters you could return this acronym to all the glory of its original full-length phrase. I don’t like to make threats (transcribed evidence to the contrary), but if you don’t put the ‘God’ back in ‘OMG’ real soon, you will be SOL.

8. Win an Oscar:  godoscarGiven how your stewardship of the planet has made it especially easy to futz around with the weather, I feel I have been unjustly overlooked for Outstanding Achievement in Special Effects for way too long now. And as a Supporting Actor (Or actress, I’m not telling), you have to admit my presence (or lack thereof, depending on your predilections) has played a pretty significant role in the movie of your sinful little life

9. Start Some New End-Of-The-World Rumors:  From what I saw of how you reacted to the predictions of my Mayan friends, you people seem to need some kind of Sword of Damocles hanging over your morbid little heads. And God knows (LOL) there are tons of other ancient calendars out there. So, just to make sure we get a little mileage out of this, I’m saying the Apocalypse will hit next on June 8, 2017. See you then!

10. Stop Helping Sports Teams Win:  This has gone on long enough, ladies and gentlemen. You’re always giving me a shout-out whenever you make a touchdown or score a free throw. Sure, every once in a while I happen to be floating by and I decide to give you a leg-up, but most of the time I have a lot more important things to do than make sure you open a can of whoop ass on the competition. From now on, you’re on your own.

Well there you have it straight from the man himself.  Whatever you do for God’s sake make it a good & prosperous New Year!

 

 

RESOLUTIONS…2013

happynewyear2 - CopyRES·O·LU·TION: (a noun) –  a firm decision to do or not to do something.    

As in today I’m going to the gym but on my way to said destination I decide to stop for a vanilla latte & scone.…then end up not going at all.

The state or quality of being resolute; firm determination…..I really wanted that scone.

Resolving to do something…..I’ll go to the gym tomorrow.

A course of action determined or decided on…..I decided to go tomorrow instead.

Are you making any for 2013?  You might want to know YOU’RE NOT ALONE!           Check back tomorrow to find out what GOD’s resolutions are for the New Year.