The Power of a New Story – The Year of Moving the Present Forward

A New Year – A New Story

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I find this timely piece written by Life Advisor Suzannah Galland to be totally inspiring. Galland uses a combination of intuition, numerology, and general “knowing” to help her clients recognize blind spots and acknowledge the truth—which they often already know but don’t want to believe. Below, she explains how we hold ourselves back by clinging to the energy of old relationships and traumas.

The Year of Moving the Present Forward

As another year closes and a new year makes itself known, we’re inspired to reminisce about the past and lay claim to what we want in the upcoming months and years. Yet, when we look back, many of us may find ourselves pretty much in the same place we were in years past—at least in certain areas of our life. We still haven’t met our dream partner, lost those 10 pounds, or risen in our career as much as we’d hoped. We can name our New Year’s resolutions till we’re blue in the face, but if we approach our life the same way as we always have, we can expect the same results. If our results have been disappointing, why not do something different? Why not move the present forward?

Moving the present forward is another way of saying drop the baggage and manifest the life you want. The only way to do this is to work with what you’ve got now—and to keep your head out of the past.

Manifestation is nothing new. The practice of intentionally creating what you want by visualizing it and feeling its energy has been around for thousands of years. It’s not hard. It’s not even time consuming. Yet most of us don’t do it. It’s possible we’re afraid of getting what we want (we might fear that we still won’t be happy). We might not honestly know what we want and, uncommitted, we put out a wishy-washy lackluster energy that peters out before it reaches the universal flow. But more likely than not (as I see this with almost all of my clients), we’re carrying too much of our past with us into the future. Of all the hold-ups to living the dream, excess baggage is the biggest culprit.

Baggage includes all our resentments, self-pity, and victim mentality—all the negative thoughts and beliefs we mutter to ourselves day in and day out. We’re too fat to date an attractive man, we’re too inexperienced to get the job, we failed last time so why try again. Combined, and over time, these thoughts and beliefs create our overall energy—the vibration level we project to the world. Maybe we had a horrid past or maybe we can’t seem to let go of an old love. We harbor these negative thoughts or resentments, and in doing so we lower our vibration level. Over time, we become our baggage. We’re consumed by it.

The Meter

Women have what I like to call creep meters. When a man enters a room or talks to us, we immediately get a sense of whether he’s got good mojo or is stalker looking for prey. We may not always trust or allow ourselves to tune into the reading, but we have it. We’re able to sense, or read, the energy vibration of another.

In truth, everyone has a meter, and we’re capable of reading more than just creeps. We sense when someone’s vibration is strong and in tune with the universe, and these are the people we want to be around. We’re drawn to them. They feel charismatic. We want to be near them. When the creep meter goes off the charts, on the other hand, we’re repelled. We can’t wait to leave the room.

Everyone has an energy vibration, and everyone is responsible for sustaining or strengthening their vibration. We are, in effect, walking balls of energy, showing the world each and every day what we’re made of. Our vibration level is a kind of personal branding. One subconscious feel of our vibration and people sense our authenticity, our mood, and more. We can show up at the table looking and feeling gorgeous and sexy, blindsiding our date momentarily. But we can’t conceal our vibration forever. Once our date sees past his libido, he’ll sense the real vibration. If it’s below his, he’ll lose interest and, sex appeal or no sex appeal, he’s out the door.

If we’re not attracting what we want, we need to increase our vibration. Good, good, good…good vibrations (the Beach Boys)!

High energy is less consumed by past experiences. High vibration people live more in the present. They feel good about life. They don’t dwell for too long on the past, and only reference it when they need information. The people with little or no baggage don’t work harder, they don’t study longer, they aren’t sexier or more beautiful, and they don’t have any special talents. They are pretty much the same as people with baggage, except for a one percent distinction—high vibration people avoid bringing their past into their future. Instead, they move their present forward.

The New Year is the perfect time to resolve to manifest because, coincidentally, the only way to reach this glorious future self is to raise your vibration by taking a short stroll into the fabulous parts of your past. Keep this visit short and sweet so you don’t wander into dangerous territory. You want to intentionally (not as if you were on autopilot) remember an event or a moment that brought you joy or great pleasure. Forget about the painful memories. Don’t even go there. You want to carry the joy forward. Go there and go deep. Smell it, taste it, feel it. Most important, sustain the feeling.

I loved this Vegas show
I loved this Vegas show – photo: d. king

Here is an example of how you could rekindle some passion by reminiscing a kiss.

A kiss says it all. Do you remember that rush of excitement or falling in love in that moment? It just took you time to realize it, but it was all there in his first kiss. His touch told you right from the start he was crazy about you.

The more you do this, the more you will remember what you can have. You develop a certain confidence, a self-assuredness, which is key, and in no time you will feel compelled to voice out loud how you know a love mate is coming in 2016. You’ll have a new story, and, if anything, your mouth will be craving a kiss.

Why does this work? Physics has proved it: The brain doesn’t know what’s real or not real. It knows what you tell it, what you believe, what you feel. So why not take some editorial license to delete what isn’t working and create a heightened, more evolved you?

The Power of a New Story

My client Stephanie is a public relations consultant for a prestigious firm in New York City. “I’m so sad,” she said, sheepishly in our Skype session. “I had just met this guy Rob. He’s handsome with wavy dark hair and his eyes are so intense. He’s exceptionally smart…we couldn’t stop talking about this and that…we had so much in common. We saw each other a few times. I didn’t sleep with him. He’d been texting me all week. The other night we were back at my apartment and he broke out into a cold sweat and chills. He opted to leave and fast…that was Thursday…and now I haven’t heard from him for four days. I mean we were texting every day regularly, and you should see his words to me. I’ve just spent the whole night crying. I don’t know what to do.”

I felt her pain and understood her crisis. To me, it was clear that she was lapsing into her history of pain and rejection. I wanted to help her.

I asked her if she could Skype me a picture of him. No kidding, he was definitely handsome. I found myself magnetized by his soft green eyes. I could see what she saw in him. He was super sexy. I had an overwhelming sense that this relationship was not over. I started to remotely profile him. He was sincere, embarrassed by the other night for sure, and extremely keen on pursuing her. He felt melancholy and removed. Yet, what was stopping him? I had a hit that he was a reactor. By that I mean that Rob was sensitive to her energy. And Stephanie’s energy was consumed by her story of rejection, abandonment, and lost loves. So if he thought of her, he was repelled.

“Stephanie,” I said calmly, “when he thinks of you, he’ll feel your pain. It’s not something he’ll be consciously aware of. But energy travels. It’s more subliminal. I mean look at how you’re feeling now? You’re full of toxic goo. Let’s shift this energy and right now!” I exclaimed boldly. “Let’s create a different story and move this forward to create a better future.” I took a pause. “Tell me how it felt being with him the first night?”

“OMG” she said excitedly. Her smile lit up the screen. “He took me to a fabulous restaurant and brought me a scarf as a gift. He said, ‘I want you to sleep with this tonight and when I next see you, wear it for me. I will smell it and know it will have your scent all over it.’”

I asked her to find the pashmina and wrap it around herself. She was delighted to do this. As our session closed, she looked (and felt) positively radiant.

Within 30 minute she texted me: “Amazing. Just heard from Rob. He explained he was out of town and not feeling well.”

Stephanie was sold. She was focused on creating a new story and understood the ramifications firsthand of carrying around the past in the present.

Letting Go of Your Go-To Story

When the past comes into the present, you become tied to this story—your go-to story. In a sense, you become addicted to this story—to your past—and you end up making history with this unwanted story. If you continue to support that story, it becomes your definition of yourself. You bring it with you. Likewise, you transmit it to others. It comes with you to a romantic dinner, to bed, while having sex, taking meetings—wherever you go, your past sits with you, smack bang in the middle of everyone and everything. The trick is not to let it define you. Even though it happened, it’s gone; it’s the past. It’s no longer your story. Let go of the story and create a new one.

Create a new and better go-to story, and make 2016 an irresistible year.  Happy New Year.

Suzannah Galland is not a typical Life Advisor. Her work combines her innovative MindSense Method™ with compelling strategic and tactical guidance. She uses intention profiling (“both those of the subject, and the intentions of people in their lives”) to give her clients immediate access to their desired results.

Suzannah is a licensed HeartMath coach, and licensed in Kinesiology by Brain Gym®. She also has Management & Leadership training from Cornell University’s certificate program in Executive Leadership.

Hello 2016!

A recap of my time between Christmas and New Year’s:

And speaking of Year of the Monkey:

Las Vegas Jack
Las Vegas Jack
The Bellagio bear is made out of flowers
The Bellagio bear is made out of flowers.  The magical Christmas display was like being in Santas workshop.
Christmas Day - joining friends at the Cosmopolitan Hotel's Wicked Spoon
Christmas Day – joining friends at the Cosmopolitan Hotel “Wicked”

newyearsday7

More Trouble in Palm Springs
newyearsday8

New Year's Eve - I started out like this
New Year’s Eve – I started out like this – complete with silver sparkle shoes.
At the stroke of midnight my carriage disappeared
At the stroke of midnight my carriage disappeared and I lost one shoe.
But I ended up like this...2 boytoys when I awoke
I ended up like this…waking up with 2 boytoys.
So I decided to climb a tree in honour of Year of the Monkey.
So I decided to climb a tree in honour of the Year of the Monkey.

Didn’t get very far!

To be continued…..

 

WISHING YOU A VERY MERRY CHRISTMAS

Love on (and off) a Leash

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From the Santa Paws Fundraiser at Tisol – presented by Love on a Leash

Getting them ready for the photo
Jack & Jia Jia get ready for their photo with Santa.  Jack wants to apply to be an Elf at the North Pole so he can be closer to all the toys.  Jia Jia pretends to be Santa by listening to Jack’s wish list.
Friend Trigger
Trigger does not look so pleased to be a reindeer. He wanted to be the Grinch.

This Christmas is about donating dollars to help our furry friends find furever homes with LOVE.

Check out my Jack ‘n Jia Jia board with all my favourite photos of them on Pinterest @

https://www.pinterest.com/girlwhowould/bangkok-jack-the-sundog-jia-jia-the-wonderdog/

Things are Cooking – an End of Year Update

As host of this blog20151212_154032 - Copy - Copy

I want to inform you that my posts will take a little hiatus over the next few weeks. During the holidays I will take a little break with no set posting schedule or theme but I can assure you that you will be hearing from me again very soon after the new year, if not before. You know I can’t leave this page for too long.

   I’m working on making some changes to this website and will be introducing a brand new logo which I hope you will approve of, something more fitting for a king and the blog in general. I’m also re-structuring and beginning to pair down.?  It’s time to let go of some things that are not working out the way they used to (as life goes, things move forward) and I will embrace the things that are working, always with an eye out for the new & unexpected.  I’m looking forward to the change and starting the new year off in a slightly new direction.kitchenblog3

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My personal life has had some major ups and downs this year but knock on wood I’m healthy and getting back on track and ready for what may come. Part of the excitement is not really knowing what may come….a paradox maybe but that’s the ambiguity of the unknown. There’s something surprising around every corner.

Things I’ve learned this year:

I’ve learned that you can never be prepared for what life may throw you (both good and bad) but you deal with it the best way possible and it makes you a stronger person in the end. (yeah you know the saying…what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger? Well, you realize you didn’t die, so that in itself is a big plus!).  That, and not take things for granted.

I’m not taking things for granted because I know how things can change in a flash.  Some changes are good but some I still have a hard time accepting.  Sometimes you don’t want to know the dirty details so your mind draws its own conclusions so you can get through the day, sometimes you’re better off knowing everything. As it stands, I’m still torn between the two.

I’ve learned to do some critical thinking, not believe what everyone says to be true, not to expect too much, to expect more, love is fleeting, love is forever, sometimes a little push is required to make everything fall naturally into place, some people may disappoint, others bring you joy, when people show you who they are, believe them the first time.   I will never be with someone who is hurtful and does not value me enough to want to talk things over before there’s a problem or misunderstanding. Best thing of all; miracles do exist but I’ve always know that. It’s all a mystery that we may never be able to fully make sense of.  So what?  Life is good! Live it well while you can.

So I’m ready for some excitement.

On that note….

I wish you nothing but joy on your personal journey and hope life treats you well wherever you may be.  Have a healthy, happy and successful 2016!

Meet me back here for more subject matters discussing Life, Style & Substance.

If you have any comments or suggestions for upcoming posts please I’d love to hear from you in the comments section.  xo1

 

 

 

 

LifeStyle – of the PARTY

The 12 SECRETS of being a GREAT GUEST (and HOST)host1

If you want to throw a great party in New York City, you probably want to call Bronson van Wyck, who has been in the business of entertaining crowds for almost 20 years (an endeavor he undertakes with his mother, who might even have better taste than him, at Van Wyck & Van Wyck). Since he’s put on events—both intimate and lavish—and designed flowers and rooms for all of them, we asked him for all the qualities of a great guest.

HOW TO THROW A GREAT PARTYhost2

by Bronson van Wyck

Mom and I started our entertaining business in 1999, but we’d already been doing it for years—all my life, in fact—together and singly, for ourselves and for our friends. Part of this was a simple matter of geography: growing up on a farm in a remote area of Arkansas, everyone who visited us had made an extra effort to get there. This was especially true because Dad came from New York, and many of our guests were his friends from back East visiting Arkansas for the first time. We felt obliged to make the trip worthwhile by making the welcome extra-special.

The other part was a deep appreciation and enjoyment of just how wonderful graciousness, generosity, and warmth can make other people feel.

The best parties happen when a host really takes the time to think about who his guests are and what situation he can create that will make them feel good about themselves. For some this might be greeting them with a warm smile or introducing them to someone who shares their interests. For others, it might be a stiff drink.

I know more than anyone that fabulous parties aren’t going to save the world, but they can make the world a better place.

Here are a few essential ingredients:

1.      Great guests.

Oscar Wilde always said he liked men with a future and women with a past. This is a very good place to start. And because most people are either talkers or listeners (only the rarest individual is both, and they get invited everywhere), it’s good to think about that ratio as well.

2.      A crowded room.

One of my first projects was for a gentleman who was a legend in his own mind, but not in anyone else’s. He wasn’t as popular as he thought he was. On the day of the party, I found out that only a 100 people were coming for a room that had been chosen to hold four times that. I went to a nursery and loaded a flatbed truck with dozens of trees—palms, bamboo, birds of paradise, and orange trees—and used them to fill a ballroom in Beverly Hills. Good plants can’t entirely replace good guests, but no one has fun in an empty room.

3.      Plenty of alcohol.

No great story begins with a cup of tea. *(I’m adding to make sure you have some extra sodas & sparkly non-alcoholic ciders on hand for those who cannot drink alcohol.

4.      A bar.

Aside from the functional aspects, guests who you like will use it to escape from conversations that they don’t.

5.      A surprise or two along the way.

We had lots of animals on the farm, from peacocks to miniature goats to a Vietnamese pot-bellied pig named Jacqueline Root Onassis van Asch van Wyck. Mom trained a cat named Benedict to sit perfectly still inside a basket that she sometimes put in the middle of the table. No one at the table would realize that Benedict was there, until at some point during the meal, he would always stand up to stretch. He would then settle back down in his basket, but after that the guests never would.

6.      A token of thanks.

The greatest gift you can give a host is to arrive 15 minutes late (but never more than 30 minutes). Earlier than this, and you’re not giving your host any margin for error, and trust me, even the best host finds that grace period beyond priceless.

7.      Don’t show up empty-handed either.

Avoid gifts like flowers which require the host to stop what she is doing and fuss with *finding a vase. I like to think about the future and the dreaded hangover that is sure to arrive the next day and give my Hellfire Bloody Mary Mix. This time of year, the only way to survive is to keep the party going. *(I’m adding that flowers are okay as long as you bring them in a vase that the host can keep – that’s why throughout the year I collect different size vases from places like thrift shops and yard sales and keep them in my garage.  Just an idea).

8.      The plus-one conundrum.

Always find out if the party is seated before you invite a guest to join you. The search for another dining chair at the eleventh hour is a challenge no host should have to face (not to mention that it makes the plus-one uncomfortable). *(I’m adding that unless you ask the host beforehand it’s rude to all of a sudden show up with an unexpected person – especially if it’s a planned menu).

9.      Be present.

With respect to your host and her guests, mentally and physically silence, store, and ignore your phone. Parties are meant to be an escape so resist the urge to check it.  *(I guess this also includes instagramming – as much as you might desire to do so.  Or if you take a few photos, instagram them later on from home).

10.  Make introductions.

There are always a few guests who don’t know the rest of group as well as the others do. A good host (and guest!) will take time to ensure that these people meet the other guests. Take it upon yourself to assume some of this responsibility. In the process, you may meet someone outside your own circle, and you may even make a new friend.

11.  Designate an outgoing guest as the house photographer and walk around to everyone.

Make them pose and get close. It is also a great way to introduce guests to each other. After the party, share the photos with the host so they have a keepsake from the big night. Save the sharing on social media for the next day. Remember you have to be present.

12.  A happy host.

The most important element of a good party is a host who’s enjoying himself/herself. Your friends are there to see you having fun. If you’re not, it shows. If you are, everything else can be forgiven.

Keep his advice in mind when throwing and attending parties not only during the holidays, but all year long.  Have fun!

Source: Goop.com

Stay tuned for more from Bronson: He and his team designed the dinner last week to celebrate the opening of goop market and their Valentino x goop collaboration. Job well done!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Food: the Portly Chef

 As they say; NEVER trust a skinny chef! 

Sakura Farms Frenched Pork Loin, creamy goat cheese & apple cinnamon compound butter, demi-glace, braised leek.
Sakura Farms Frenched Pork Loin, creamy goat cheese & apple cinnamon compound butter, demi-glace, braised leek – the BEST!

Last night I went to a pre-Christmas celebration with my family at a restaurant called “the Portly Chef” where everything is cooked using fresh local ingredients.  The generously plated and incredible tasting food made up for what may have been a bit lacking in ambience (but not the company, mind you). We all said it was one of the best restaurant meals we’ve had in a long time.  A few photos:

mussels & fries with truffle butter
mussels in white wine, capers & flat-leaf parsley and fries with truffle butter – for starters
Ahi Tuna
Ahi Tuna Tower
Mac 'n Cheese appetizer
Mac ‘n Cheese appetizer
Filet Oscar, certified AAA beef tenderloin, prawns, house béarnaise, pomme purée
Filet Oscar, certified AAA beef tenderloin, prawns, house béarnaise, pomme purée
Lemon Curd Cheesecake
Lemon Curd Cheesecake – soooo good!
I may have overdressed
A bit over dressed (and a bit under dressed)

And that was just my portion!

No; we really ended up sampling and sharing everything.

 

 

The best selfie of the 3 of us from the evening - which is pretty sad
Selfie Siblings – a sad looking bunch
Address: 1211 Lonsdale Ave, North Vancouver
Located: 1211 Lonsdale Ave, North Vancouver

It’s a fairly casual place with exceptional food, friendly service and mid-range pricing.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

FUN – the INstagraMan

Have you seen this YouTube Video?  Is it Familiar?  I thought so!  Although some husbands are only part-timers!instagram-husband_garance-dore-770x428

Check it out HERE:

Instagram Hair Moments (no husband in sight).  Sometimes you’re left to your own device.

Two is better than One
Two is better than One
Whatever it takes
Whatever it takes
Almost Done?
Almost Done?
Ready for my Close-Up
Ready for my Close-Up & a little Top-Up

Follow along @ https://www.instagram.com/girlwhowouldbeking/

 

Feel-good Friday: Pirelli Calendar 2016 by Annie Leibovitz

It’s about feeling good as you are and embracing beauty in all its glory by sidestepping overt sexiness and replacing it with beautiful women of various shapes, sizes, age, background and ethnicity.

Actress Yao Chen, the first Chinese UNHCR Goodwill Ambassador. Photo: Annie Leibovitz/Pirelli Calendar
Actress Yao Chen, the first Chinese UNHCR Goodwill Ambassador. Photo: Annie Leibovitz/Pirelli Calendar

Photographer Annie Leibovitz took a simple and natural approach to the portraits this year.  Famous women “as themselves with no touchups.”  The women who were photographed (including Yoko Ono) and many others find it to be quite empowering especially for a calendar normally famous for it’s sleek sexy look.

Showing Strength. Tennis player Serena Williams. Photo: Annie Leibovitz/Pirelli Calendar
Showing Strength. Tennis player Serena Williams. Photo: Annie Leibovitz/Pirelli Calendar

If these images give you a *Vanity Fair vibe (see my comment below), there’s a few reasons why. Not only is Leibovitz a frequent contributor to the magazine (she photographed Caitlyn Jenner’s cover this year, for example), but the calendar was styled by the magazine’s fashion and style director, Jessica Diehl, and Senior Photo Producer Kathryn Macleod served as creative consultant.

Singer Patti Smith. Photo: Annie Leibovitz/Pirelli Calendar
Singer Patti Smith. Photo: Annie Leibovitz/Pirelli Calendar

About time!

To see the whole Pirelli Calendar shot by Annie Leibowitz please visit:

http://pirellicalendar.pirelli.com/en/the-cal-2016/home

 *I was lucky to be given a private tour of the Vanity Fair offices at Condé Nast in New York for a research project once.  The magazine is so creative in not only covering fashion and movie people but also popular culture and current affairs in an interesting and evocative way.  The artistically shot covers never fail to capture my attention.

 

 

beauty – apothecary appeal

Ever since the time I set foot in the original Kiehl’s homeopathic pharmacy in NYC

people are starting to go for a more natural approach - not tested on animals is a good start
people are starting to go for a more natural approach – not tested on animals is a good start

I was in heaven; hooked on the clean simplicity of the packaging and their natural old-fashioned appeal. Plus I actually loved a lot of the product line and it was a special treat to not be able to find it everywhere. As in “I went to New York and brought you back this special “ultra-facial” moisturizing cream, blah, blah.” But that was before it was purchased by L’Oreal and started to become mainstream and now sold in independant retail and high-end department stores including select airport locations world wide. You can’t blame them for selling out but it was more of a unique shopping destination at the time.apoc1

Several hundred years ago, you’d go to an apothecary to pick up medicine or to seek medical attention. Those jobs belonged to pharmacists and general practitioners, but now apothecaries are popping up again,  just in a slightly different capacity. Back in the day, an apothecary treated all different ailments, now the term encompasses beauty products, home goods, natural stuff and the like.  What’s old is new again?apoc3

But in line with the apothecaries of old, a lot of  beauty products are medicinally focused.  Things to help with thinning hair, dry skin and scalp, eczema and the like.  It’s all need-based and since the products are packaged fairly simply, the prices are usually lower – but not always.apoc2australia

A lot of these products are made with herbs and essential oils – but there are herbs that are good for your skin and there are others that are not depending on your problem area. You should do a little bit of homework beforehand even though sales people should be aware of what will work for you.  Don’t always count on it.

Most of the apothecary products selling now are very good, clean products and they have a lot of heart behind them. If you look closely you’ll find that the bottles all look the same or very similar – it’s the label that sets them apart (of course, what’s inside is what really counts). The focus being that a certain care and quality is infused (and expected) in products which are made in small batches.skin7

If the recent shift in the beauty market towards transparency and awareness is any indication, this is the kind of shopping experience consumers are starting to be attracted to again.  Customers now are more educated and come in with the right questions and they know what they’re looking for.  You have to because there’s much more to choose from but isn’t that a lot better than not having any choices?

WANT Apothecary has launched its first West Coast boutique in Vancouver's South Granville neighbourhood.
WANT Apothecary has launched its first West Coast boutique in Vancouver’s South Granville neighbourhood.

Montreal-born clothing and lifestyle boutique WANT Apothecary has opened its first West Coast outpost in Vancouver. Nestled among the art galleries and shops on South Granville, WANT Apothecary (2956 Granville Street) fits right into the neighbourhood with its charming boutique storefront and European flair.

What kind of skincare products are you using?  Do you stick to the same line, mix it up or go for something totally different each time?