I hope you enjoyed a wonderful long weekend. Now it’s back to business, back to school, back to back.September represents a:Which I will try my very best to embrace
I believe in the laws of attraction. I believe that people, places and things come into your life when you need or manifest them, or to teach you a lesson. I’m not sure about the ending. That’s a big question mark that I’ll never understand. But my husband, like my dog, just showed up at my door one day and changed my life forever and for better.
When I first met Don he was wearing a pale yellow shirt with a front button missing and carrying a paperback novel. His demeanor was the exact opposite of the crazy whirlwind relationship I ended months prior with an extroverted, creative, complicated guy with a gambling problem from NYC. At first glance Don was more down to earth, reserved, relaxed but solid. I was immediately attracted. Of course he turned out to be a lot more than that. A disciplined hard working, well-traveled, intelligent, caring, kind and philosophical man with utmost integrity. A man of his word as well as someone you could trust. On the down side, quite stubborn, but I was always happy when I could change his mind about something he was very set on not changing.
At the time we met, before Don started his own company as a consultant engineer for telecommunications, he was managing an office in Toronto. He kept a condo in Vancouver, always with the intention of moving back here. A mutual friend from Toronto asked him to deliver photos from another friend’s wedding we had just attended in San Francisco instead of putting them in the mail. I forgot to bring my camera to San Francisco and I often wonder what my life would have been like had I taken it. So he brought them to me, and right after he left I called my mom and said this “I just met someone who showed up at my door and don’t know why but I’m pretty sure this is the man I’m going to spend my life with.” Crazy, right?
But true. That was 27 short years ago and we were married for 25 of them.
In between we created a life well lived.
The Road Well Traveled. Photo Credit: Lisa King
A life filled with travel, adventure, a few rocky patches but overall, more good times than bad, up until the very end. He was my advisor and my best friend. That’s why I decided to do whatever in my power to try to make him well when he got sick with kidney cancer. He was re-diagnosed a little over two years ago and it was starting to spread.
Even during that time filled with uncertainty he managed to surprise me with his strong will several times. We were able to make a few memorable trips even though his health was not good. He would not give up easily. The past several months were the hardest. The last two were the worst. I borrowed a hospital bed from the Red Cross with the most comfortable inflatable mattress cover for Don so he could be downstairs at home on one level because it would be easier. But it was not. I was his nurse until I had to get weekly, then daily help. My life was not my own. He gave me the biggest compliment by saying that there was nothing a nurse could do that I could not do. But I don’t believe that. I was just trying to cope as well as make nutritious meals before deciding to just make whatever he craved be it macaroni & cheese to ceviche. And believe me, it was all over the map. He was craving food from his childhood to when he worked in the desert in Saudi. A meal from a can to Sablefish. Never a dull moment or at least, meal.
Then I found out about Vancouver Hospice Society with their incredible staff and volunteers. A place in a reconverted house in Shaugnessey with only 8 beds and a wait list. I went there, and after meeting the director and looking around at the home like atmosphere, decided it would be the best place for care and to free up quality time for me to spend with Don. Luckily a bed became available within a few days. The private room was lovely overlooking an outdoor patio with plants, a flat screen TV and a pull-out sofa bed which my dog and I slept on every night. Don was only there for 10 days.
The night before he went into Vancouver Hospice he told me he wanted to give me something personal. I won’t say what it was but it was meaningful and very moving. At that stage I knew that he knew he was dying. Before that, he was always optimistic and full of hope. Nobody mentioned the actual dying part, so it was extremely sad and I could not stop crying. He then said “there is a beginning, a middle and an end to everything. My end is coming and now you can have a new beginning.” He was very thankful to me for all I had done to try and help him. He said all this in a matter of fact way and I could feel that he now wanted the humility and discomfort to finally come to a finish. His mind was good right up until the very end.
I will forever be grateful for having Don in my life. No other person has done so much for me in so many areas. I am a much better person for having known him. He was also a true friend to my sister and they had become very close. He was a mentor to many people. Well respected and trusted. It was important for my brother to spend a few minutes explaining how he felt near the end. He shared something special and I have to say that since my mom passed away, I have never seen my brother cry so hard. He was close to his brother George who lives in Toronto, and who gave him a much needed surprise visit in July. I had no idea the influence Don had on so many, although I’m not surprised.
I was by his side holding his left hand when he took his very last breath. Lisa (my sister) was holding his right hand. He looked peaceful. Lisa didn’t leave my side for three days following. My dear friend Margeaux left her business and drove eight hours to spend the next four days/nights with me. I’m forever grateful.
A few quotes on the very first day of a bright new month
“Remember to be gentle with yourself and others. We are all children of chance and none can say why some fields will blossom while others lay brown beneath the August sun.”— Kent Nerburn (American writer).
“Everything good, everything magical happens between the months of June and August.”—Jenny Han, The Summer I Turned Pretty
“August rain: the best of the summer gone, and the new fall not yet born. The odd uneven time.” ―Sylvia Plath, The Unabridged Journals of Sylvia Plath
“When summer opens, I see how fast it matures, and fear it will be short; but after the heats of July and August, I am reconciled, like one who has had his swing, to the cool of autumn.”— Ralph Waldo Emerson (American essayist and scholar).
Some of the best people are born in this month; one was my mother
“The first week of August hangs at the very top of summer, the top of the live-long year, like the highest seat of a Ferris wheel when it pauses in its turning. The weeks that come before are only a climb from balmy spring, and those that follow a drop to the chill of autumn, but the first week of August is motionless, and hot. It is curiously silent, too, with blank white dawns and glaring noons, and sunsets smeared with too much color.” ―Natalie Babbitt, Tuck Everlasting
Never forget to apply sunscreen. I love her retro look.
Chic Peek: Style on the Street (somewhere else)We just had a Sunday afternoon Tea Party with a variety of homemade finger sandwiches (sans pink, green + yellow food-grade dye like my mom used to do with the bread – yeah she did!), old-fashioned deviled eggs and some sweets to finish. And tea.
Maybe not high-tea. More like medium-low but delicious nonetheless. Highly recommend it!
You may have noticed or not because everyone is caught up relishing the joys of Summer. It’s normal for me to cut back posts from mid-July until the end of August. Time to wind down. I become more lazy, take time out for myself, spend more time outside and quality time with others.
However at present I am devoting my full time and energy to a very difficult family situation. Eventually I might write about it. It’s the first time in a loooong time that I find it hard to concentrate on more than what is at hand. It’s been emotionally draining and I must look after myself on top of it all because…
Simple pleasures: it’s strange to note that something as unexciting as changing the bed sheets give me a simple boost of pleasure. Something as habitual as sitting down with my morning coffee to check e-mails is more relaxing than normal and a fifteen minute afternoon nap is heaven sent. I don’t function well when there is chaos around me and my surroundings need to be relatively clean and tidy.
Which brings me back to what it means to take time out. It’s important to not totally deplete your energy. And we don’t need Denis Waitley (best-selling author of the audio series “The Psychology of Winning” and books such as “Seeds of Greatness” and “The Winner’s Edge”) to tell us so. Although he did say:
Time and health are two precious assets that we don’t recognize and appreciate until they have been depleted.
Always scrambling for new healthy breakfast ideas, my gut feeling said that this would be an excellent choice. Made with good-for-you *kimchi and leftover vegetables topped over wilted spinach it was!
photo/recipe – d. king
Story at-a-glance *Kimchi is a fermented blend of cabbage, chili peppers, garlic, scallions, and other spices often eaten with every meal in Korea. Rich in vitamins A and C due to its fermentation process, it is also rich in beneficial gut-boosting lactobacilli bacteria. Kimchi has potent antioxidative and immune-stimulating activities along with anti-obesity effects and more more. Basically it is a super healthy additive or mid afternoon snack on its own.
As it turns out I was not so imaginative using kimchi in a scramble as I thought because there is a ton of recipes out there.
How-to:
First wilt a handful of spinach in butter. Set aside.
In same frypan stir in chopped red pepper, broccoli, green onion + parsley. Then add some kimchi (amount depending on how much you like – it’s a required taste but I actually love it). I also added some freshly grated carrot (optional).
In another small bowl beat with a fork two free-range eggs. When vegetables are tender, add the eggs and mix together. Top over spinach.
Notes: for sides instead of making homefried potatoes I steamed yams then mashed with a little (grass fed) butter, sliced avocado with sesame seeds and baked beans.
Being a tourist in the town where you reside can be a dream if you make the right connections.This charming boutique hotel is conveniently located in downtown Vancouver amid excellent shopping and dining. It’s luxurious with a relaxing ambiance.
Salt Water Pool
The large corner room was very clean with a huge bathroom and really comfortable beds.
Room with a view (sort of)
The efficient staff was very helpful in making recommendations on where to eat and places to see (even though we were already quite familiar). They have several bikes on site which you can reserve for four hours at a time so cruising through Stanley Park with a pitstop at English Bay Cactus Club was a breeze.
En Route, Air Canada magazine has this to say:
With kitchens equipped with Bosch appliances and staff that greet you by name in the hallways, L’Hermitage feels more like a chic European pied-à-terre than a hotel in downtown Vancouver. What we loved The hotel welcomes four-legged friends with Torre & Tagus ceramic bowls, cozy cushions and a walking service. If you only have one night Enjoy the sun while sipping a Nespresso in a velvet armchair in your suite’s private solarium overlooking the saltwater pool.
Maybe it’s the influence of a fashionable friend visiting from London or maybe it could be that I’ve always found LONDON WOMEN have a look (aka the London Look) that’s a bit more edgy or funky (for lack of a better word because groovy is what really comes to mind) over the rest of us. I admire the way they experiment with clothing and accessories and manage to pull off something more avant-garde and make it chic and fun. it’s not necessarily anything trendy or something we’re so used to seeing. Which leaves us wondering…hmmm how did she pull it off? For this post we look to the feet.
Feet found on the streets of London during Fashion Week – unfortunately not by me.
MOD WOMEN
Photos: Vogue (UK), Buro (but chosen by me from plenty more images).
Last night was the first time I made this dish. I’ve been in the mood to try satisfying meatless meals and something easy to prepare & fairly quick to cook. It’s a keeper. This one is filled with goodness like mushrooms, chickpeas and marinara sauce. Plus it’s only 143 calories per serving for those of you watching your weight. Why Spaghetti squash? (see bottom for some of the health benefits). This squash possesses an uncanny resemblance to spaghetti strands when cooked, and for this reason is known as vegetable spaghetti which makes the dish when combined with the rest, taste somewhat like a vegetarian lasagna. You can add other veggies like zucchini, red bell peppers or broccoli. It was delicious especially with the added sriracha hot sauce (I always zip it up with a little heat on the side).
Serves: Makes 8 cups
Ingredients
1 (3 lb.) spaghetti squash
2 tsp olive oil
1 medium onion, chopped
8 oz. mushrooms, thinly sliced
3 garlic cloves, minced
¾ tsp ground oregano
½ tsp ground pepper
⅛ tsp salt
1 ½ cups marinara sauce (your favorite kind)
1 ¾ cups (no salt added) chickpeas, rinsed & drained
¼ cup minced flat-leaf parsley
⅓ cup grated Parmesan cheese (animal rennet-free for vegetarian)
Additional veggies to add (optional of course) with the onions & mushroom: red bell pepper, zucchini and/or broccoli, and a little chopped jalapeño for zing.
Instructions
Here’s the best way to cook spaghetti squash! Cut it in half, scoop out the seeds, rub a little olive oil and salt on the inside, and roast in the oven cut-side down. OR;
Using a large, sharp knife, pierce the spaghetti squash in several pieces.
Place the spaghetti squash in a glass baking dish and cook in the microwave on high for about 15 minutes, turning the squash halfway through cooking.
Before handling, let the squash stand until slightly cooled. Using a fork, twist out strands of the spaghetti squash flesh and place in a large bowl.
Preheat the broiler.
Heat the olive oil in a large nonstick or cast-iron skillet, set over medium-high heat.
Add the onion and mushrooms. Cook, stirring occasionally, until the vegetables are tender and just starting to brown, 5 to 6 minutes.
Add the garlic, oregano, pepper and salt. Cook for 1 minute.
Stir in the reserved spaghetti squash, marinara sauce, chickpeas and parsley.
Spread the spaghetti squash mixture into an even layer in the skillet. Top with the Parmesan cheese.
Place the skillet under the broiler until the cheese is melted, 1 to 2 minutes. Serve.
Spaghetti squash is also rich in the B vitamins riboflavin, niacin, and thiamin, which promote optimal cellular function. Folate is also found in this bright-colored vegetable. Folate supports the formation and development of new cells and may help prevent birth defects, making this squash an ideal food for pregnant women. This nutrient can also help filter out homocysteine from your blood and promote cardiovascular health.
Potassium, a mineral that maintains proper muscle and nerve function, is also present in spaghetti squash, making it helpful for people with high blood pressure. Manganese, a mineral that assists in bone and tissue heath, metabolism, calcium absorption, and nerve function, is another key component. Spaghetti squash also contains the essential minerals calcium, iron, phosphorus, and zinc.
Another reason to consume spaghetti squash is for its omega-3 and omega-6 fats content. Omega-3 fats are associated with the prevention of inflammation, which may cause heart disease, arthritis, and certain types of cancer. On the other hand, omega-6 fats are linked to proper brain function. It is critical to maintain the ideal 1:1 ratio of these fats.
I hope you enjoyed a wonderful long weekend. Now it’s back to business, back to school, back to back.
September represents a:
Which I will try my very best to embrace
We just had a Sunday afternoon Tea Party with a variety of homemade finger sandwiches (sans pink, green + yellow food-grade dye like my mom used to do with the bread – yeah she did!), old-fashioned deviled eggs and some sweets to finish. And tea.
But you can still enjoy it!
Do you like kimchi?
This charming boutique hotel is conveniently located in downtown Vancouver amid excellent shopping and dining. It’s luxurious with a relaxing ambiance.
Girl Who Would be KING on Life, Style and INSPIRATION. 
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